Making Room for the Goodness of God in Prayer
By Pierre Eade
One Saturday morning I was scurrying around our church, getting ready for our men’s breakfast. I turned to my son Elijah, held out my keys to him and said, “Elijah—”
Before I could say anything else, he replied, “Would you please?”
He said the exact three words that were about to come out of my mouth. We laughed, and I slowed my frantic pace.
How did my son know with pinpoint accuracy what I was about to say? Does he possess the gift of prophecy? Maybe.
But in this instance, it was probably the gift of predictability. My reliance upon my responsible 12-year-old son to help me with small tasks around the church (and home) had become so predictable that he could complete my sentence. It is not uncommon for those who know us the best to be able to predict our behavior, actions, and words.
Introducing God the Father
A few years ago a question gently came to my mind: “How would Jesus describe the nature of God the Father?”
The question made me curious. Logically, I thought, those who know us best are the ones who live closest to us. My three kids know the real me. They can predict my standard lines or forecast when a “bad Dad” joke is on its way. They know the clues and can figure out when I’m tired and worn out.
So wouldn’t it make sense that Jesus knows the Father better than anyone else?
When I searched the Bible for an answer, I found my logical conclusion backed by biblical truth. Jesus taught, “All things have been committed to me by my Father. No one knows the Son except the Father, and no one knows the Father except the Son and those to whom the Son chooses to reveal him” (Matt. 11:27).
What an audacious and amazing statement for Jesus to make about Himself and His relationship with God!
First of all, He says that all things have been handed over to Him by God. That includes God’s authority, His people, His judgments—everything.1 In essence, Jesus is saying, “God has put Me in charge.” That’s quite a statement to make about yourself!
But wait. He goes further.
Jesus says that nobody knows Him except the Father, and nobody knows the Father except the Son. Jesus is saying that the relationship He has with God the Father is not like any other relationship. It is closer than the most intimate relationship between a man and a woman. It is more exclusive than the words of a binding contract between two parties. Jesus and the Father are deeply connected to one another with no middleman (or middlewoman) in between—with one important exception. Jesus says, “No one knows the Father except the Son and anyone to whom the Son chooses to reveal him” (italics added).
In other words, Jesus has added one clause to this exclusive contract between the Father and Son. Jesus has exclusive rights to knowing God the Father, but He is also willing to reveal the Father to those He chooses.
Now we’re getting somewhere. Jesus knows the Father best, so if we want to meet the Father, we need to ask Jesus for an introduction. That simple truth became the premise and theme of my book, Our Good Father.
What makes this even more interesting is that the word reveal, used in most English versions of the Bible, is translated from a Greek word meaning “to take off the cover or disclose.”2 It can also mean, “to make known” or “discover what before was unknown.”3 So Jesus is saying He has the ability and authority to take the cover off the mystery of God the Father, so we can truly know Him for ourselves.
Creating a Blank Canvas
When I came upon this truth, I realized I was standing at a critical juncture in my relationship with God. I was being invited to come and see the Father’s heart, like never before, through the lens of Jesus’ words. If I wanted to truly know the Father and have the most accurate picture of His nature, I needed to study the words of Jesus to see what He said about His Father.
With that in mind, I decided to give God a blank canvas and ask Jesus to paint a new picture in my mind and spirit to show me the real nature of the Father.
As I dove head first into the words of Jesus to discover the true nature of God the Father, I found an overall theme Jesus wanted to get across to His audience—My Father is good. The good nature of God the Father was something Jesus seemed to emphasize time and again as He taught, preached, and told stories about His Father in heaven.
One of the more familiar passages where Jesus emphasizes the goodness of the Father is Matthew 7:11: “If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!”
My favorite three words in this passage are, how much more. If a flawed individual like me can have the mind and heart to want to bless my children, how much more does a perfect heavenly Father desire to bless us—His kids—with every good thing?
We can apply these questions to our prayer life:
- Do we trust the Father enough to ask Him for the things that are on our hearts?
- Do we believe the Father to be good at heart, not willing to give us something harmful, evil, or bad?
- If we knew with complete certainty that God would never give us anything bad, no matter what we asked for, how would it change the way we pray?
Catching Myself
As I studied the teachings of Jesus to learn about the Father, my own prayer life began to change. I began to catch myself praying to God in ways that, at best, underestimated what God could do—and, at worst, were unbiblical and lacked genuine faith. I felt convicted that I thought myself better than God!
Let me explain. As a father, I know it is in my heart to give my children only the best in life. Even when I say no, it is because I want what’s best for my kids in every way possible. For instance, last night I told my son he could not have a full glass of chocolate milk before bed. Was it because I do not love him? No, it was because I do love him! I know that chocolate milk before bed is a recipe for either insomnia or crazy dreams.
That’s not to say I don’t make mistakes and that I have not erred in my judgment, attitude, actions, or inaction. I’m just saying that I want the best for my children, both now and in their future. So how can I have such confidence in my own goodness, yet, at times, when I pray, I lack similar trust in Father God’s goodness?
As this journey of discovering the goodness of God began to unfold, I started to catch myself praying in ways that did not give God much credit. “God, if You could . . . Lord, if You might . . . Father, if You see it best. . . .” I kept finding myself speaking to God in ways that made Him “less good” than what my own kids perceive me to be!
I am still a work in progress. My mind is still being renewed to fully believe in the goodness of God. But here are two practical elements that have helped me adjust the way I pray in order to make room for God’s goodness:
1. Adding an Adjective.
One of the habits I have developed in my prayer life is to put an adjective before the Father’s name when I pray. Instead of starting my prayer by saying, “Father God,” I will say, “Good Father,” or “Faithful Father,” or even, “Loving Daddy.” I have found that when I add simple adjectives such as good, faithful, and loving, it sets the right tone for my prayers.
When I start my prayer with, “Good Father,” it is hard to begin complaining or moaning about what I see is wrong. Instead, I am more inclined to seek Him to make everything work together for my good. When I begin by praying, “Faithful Father,” I am setting myself up to pray with His promises or past victories in mind. When I pray, “Loving Daddy,” I know I am coming to my Father who has compassion and mercy upon His children.
2. Negating My Prayers.
One of the newer elements I occasionally throw in is to negate my prayers and ask for an upgrade. When Jesus prayed, “yet not my will, but yours be done” (Luke 22:42), He was doing so as an act of submission to the Father in prayer. Yet when I pray these words, it is not always with the same pure motive of surrender. Instead, I may want to offer to God a concession to do less than what I have asked Him to do because of my own lack of faith!
I think we’re all familiar with this type of prayer: “Father, I ask you to heal my friend—yet not my will, but Your will be done.” When I pray this way, instead of surrendering the situation to God in prayer, my heart may be saying to the Father, “If you cannot handle this big a request, then I will settle for something less. I will settle for Your will instead.”
Far be it from me to ever think I need to lower my standard in prayer to meet God’s ability! I remind myself that if I, being evil, know how to give good gifts to my kids, how much more will my Father?
So now, I often ask God to negate my prayers in order to receive His better answers. I might pray, “Father, if what I have asked for is anything less than what You want to give me, then negate my prayers and give me Your very best!” That’s a whole different way of praying “Your will be done”! It is still an act of surrender—but it’s one that believes God for the ultimate best in the situation, even beyond what I can ask, imagine, or think (Eph. 3:20).
Reflecting His Goodness?
Remember that incident of my son and I preparing for the prayer breakfast together? He knew my personality so well that he anticipated what I was about to say. Likewise, in our relationship with Father God, we can know His personality so well that we can anticipate His “goodness” in His response to our prayers.
Considering the goodness of God, we can ask ourselves this question: “Does my prayer life reflect that I am speaking with a God who is completely good?”
If the answer is no, how might we need to change the way we pray in order to make room for the goodness of God in our lives?
1See Matthew 28:18, John 3:35, 5:22, 27; 6:37–40, 10:25–30, 13:3.
2Strong’s Greek Dictionary #601, apokalýptō.
3Blue Letter Bible website, accessed January 23, 2017, blueletterbible.org/lang/lexicon/lexicon.cfm?t=kjv&strongs=g601.
PIERRE EADE is pastor of outreach at The Crossing, Washington Crossing, PA, and the author of Born to Grow and Our Good Father. He blogs at discipleshipnetwork.com.
